Saturday, December 06, 2014

"Merry Christmas to All, and to All a Goodis Night"

By Peter Rozovsky

"Turn over, baby. You’re burning up," she cooed. "Let me do your front.”

The fat red man purred contentedly. Then he opened his mouth and screamed. He awoke from the dream jammed down the chimney, flames licking at his back. From above, a shaft of weak, sooty light and murmured voices.

“But, Rudy, what about—“

“Leave the fat guy. I’m out of here. Who’s with me?”

“I’m in,” a voice said.

“Dasher?”

“Yeah.”

"You on, Dancer? Prancer? Vixen? Comet? Good. Let’s go.”

Back down in hell, the fat red man shut his eyes and heard them exclaim as they drove out of sight …


© Peter Rozovsky 2014
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15 Comments:

Blogger Unknown said...

Okay, what kind of hallucinogen is at the root of the imagined scenario? Yikes! I'm suddenly very afraid of reindeer! (I wonder what Gene Autry would have said about this version of "Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer.")

December 06, 2014  
Blogger Peter Rozovsky said...

You're right; I must have been hallucinating. My tale is more like Jim Thompson than it is like David Goodis.

December 06, 2014  
Blogger Unknown said...

Some writers -- shall we include you? -- do their best work under the influence. Consider S. T. Coleridge, Dylan Thomas, Hammett, and Hammett's tweety-pie Lillian Hellman. So, punning the 60s and 70s, write on, Peter, write on!

December 06, 2014  
Blogger Peter Rozovsky said...

If only I could fall under the influence more often!

December 06, 2014  
Blogger adrian mckinty said...

Peter

I really have to read more David Goodis. I've only ever read 1 or 2, but as a Jim THompson fan I think I wd like his oeuvre...

December 06, 2014  
Blogger Peter Rozovsky said...

You might continue your Goodis reading with Street of No Return or Cassidy's Girl or the story "Black Pudding." I'm no Goodis completist, and I think some of his books are regarded as weaker than others. I haven't read any of the weak ones, though.

December 06, 2014  
Blogger Peter Rozovsky said...

The invocation of hell toward the end of my little piece is a bit like The Getaway or maybe even Savage Night, which I realized only after I finished writing. We creative writers may be creatures of complete originality, but fortunately our muses are well-read.

December 06, 2014  
Blogger seana graham said...

But where are the reindeers going?

December 06, 2014  
Blogger Peter Rozovsky said...

To a sleazy strip club called ... the North Pole.

December 06, 2014  
Blogger Unknown said...

I've been to that club. The reindeer Dancer was actually a pole-dancer at the Pole. Some of the patrons have complained about the horny reindeer. No one was safe. (Groan!)

December 06, 2014  
Blogger seana graham said...

Aye yay yay--what have I started?

December 06, 2014  
Blogger Peter Rozovsky said...

In the sequel and his reindeer friends--call them the Donner party--get unruly then they discover that the North Pole is some joint uptown and that it's a lot closer to Warsaw than to the Arctic Circle. Or maybe the bouncer insists they're drunk, and Rudy's story about why his nose is red only makes things worse.

December 06, 2014  
Blogger Peter Rozovsky said...

Seana, the position as my muse is open. It pays 10 percent of net sales.

I have always wanted to go with a group of friends to a restaurant and leave my name as Donner just to see if the person who calls us when our table is ready does the right thing.

December 06, 2014  
Blogger Unknown said...

Ho . . . Ho . . . Ho . . .

And that leads me to a question: Who is making the fat man so jolly at the beginning?

BTW, I no longer hang out at the Pole. It got too expensive. Too many bucks.

December 06, 2014  
Blogger Peter Rozovsky said...

Maybe I'll call the story (or book?) Ho, Ho, Hell. Or I could borrow and alter one of Donald Westlake's titles and call it Sleighground.

December 06, 2014  

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