F——— Peter Rozovsky!

Hell, why don't we do that?'

"`Because it's y'know, Peter Rozovsky's idea.'

"`Fuck Peter Rozovsky.'

"`Yeah, fuck him.'

"Noir at the Bar in St. Louis was on."

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That's from the foreword to Noir at the Bar, a collection of stories by authors who have appeared at a reading series of that name in St. Louis inspired, in turn, by a reading series of that name I started in Philadelphia.

Why a bar? Why noir? In part because the guy I first discussed the idea with was a bartender, and his bar had black walls. But also because, as Jedidiah Ayres (co-editor with the mad Scott Phillips), writes: "The dark was an integral part. It hides blushes, obscures trouser tents, and makes you look more attractive. The drinks are self-explanatory."

Here's the beginning of the collection's first story:

"That's the biggest cock I've ever seen."

Here's how that section of the story ends:

"I turned around to face the huge rooster that was staring me down and I thought about shooting him too."

One day I'll give these guys the thanks they deserve. For now, though, I feel like a proud father sending his kid off to school, then being called to the principal's office a few hours later to find a smirking kid, a cop taking a statement, and a tearful teacher pulling thumbtacks out of her butt.

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Read about the collection here. Order it from Subterranean Books. And read about the original Noir at the Bar here at Detectives Beyond Borders.

© Peter Rozovsky 2011