Sunday, March 08, 2009

Baltimore Drive-By, Part XV: The big break-in

I set my briefcase on the concrete floor beside the yellow Porsche, and I extracted my tools: a bag of sugar, my old metal pica ruler, and three pounds of hamburger meat. I laid everything on the floor, and I pulled on a pair of rubber surgical gloves. I didn't expect to leave prints, but you can't be too careful.

"Posh car for an editor," Seamus said. "And what would you be planning with all that?"

"Break in, slip the meat under the passenger seat, then sugar the gas tank. Boom! Meat rots, car stinks, engine banjaxed."

Seamus leaned against the Porsche's left rear wheel well and lit a cigarette. "Been a while since you've driven a car, has it?"
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(Read the rest here. And remember: This is fiction. It never happened and never will.)

© Peter Rozovsky 2009

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2 Comments:

Blogger Dorte H said...

Hilarious post! Remember to check out what kind of society & times you are in before you plan any sabotage actions. Maybe this explains why I´d never turn criminal. I would be scared stiff that I hadn´t controlled everything properly LOL

March 08, 2009  
Blogger Peter Rozovsky said...

Yes, even criminals must keep au courant and face the possibility of constant professional retraining in today's fast-paced economy.

March 08, 2009  

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